blog 3: reflections and thoughts around the making of “Meet Cute”

Apologies

The crazy has begun. Indeed, the crazy has been ongoing: the "Meet Cute" team, spearheaded by cowriter and director extraordinaire Patrick Currie along with our fantastic producers Michele Picard, Michelle Morris, and Yogi Omar, has been pulling things together with heaps of hard work, long hours, rehearsals, read through, fittings, phone calls, meetings; planning everything conceivable to allow for shooting to go smoothly… But tomorrow the fun begins. "Meet Cute" starts shooting tomorrow.

In my small little corner of the production… In the midst of transitioning from cowriter to actor and doing all the necessary preparation which comes with this, I still found myself, throughout my very Vancouverite run along the seawall this morning, thinking about the artists' tendency to apologize. This does come into play in this process of developing a film for Crazy 8s, of course in the context of asking for money from the contest and free time from all our amazing contributors, but especially seeing as the content of our film deals with the B in the LGBTQ acronym. Us B's (bisexuals) are constantly apologizing and having to explain ourselves to others, and to ourselves, because we are so underrepresented (if you don't believe me, read this: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/the-establishment/bisexual-invisibility-the_b_9177988.html). So creating a film in this world means we [occasionally and out of habit] feel the temptation to explain, justify, and apologize for who we are and what we are creating. Combining that with the artistic tendency to apologize for our work possibly to downplay how much work goes into its creation or how much it costs us emotionally and financially to make ("I didn't have enough time/resources," "I know it's not much," "I hope it's OK") makes for some pretty potent apology temptation.

Indeed, http://www.thefreedictionary.com (I know my sources appear questionable here) defines apology as, "1. an oral or written expression of regret or contrition for a fault or failing." In my mind, humans need only apologize for two things: doing something thoughtless, wrongful, hurtful, malicious, or otherwise mean, or not doing what was expected of us in a situation in which it was clearly and realistically outlined and previously agreed upon. Potentially in the context of loss we may apologize as well, but those apologies are of a different nature altogether because they come from a place of no responsibility…

Ideally we might just do our very best all the time and find no need in our actions for apology. But we are human and flawed and emotional – and we make mistakes! Also, here in Vancouver, we are Canadian, and Canadians apologize for just about everything. The number of times I have backed up into a wall and apologized to it before realizing it was inanimate are to date countless. But here in the True North Strong and Free, most of us have done it. We apologize automatically.

In the Canadian film industry we are roped into the American film industry; as Canadians in the industry we simply apologize for being north of the American border! If it seems absurd I think it's because it is.

Why does this matter?

I believe that as artists we could apologize less and take more risks. Ultimately people will connect to what we connect to and ignore what we don't, unless it offends us and gives us cause to riot, which can be a kind of entertainment in itself. As an artist it is my [perceived] duty to translate the human experience into a tangible emotional journey. Perhaps only a few facets at a time in digestible chunks, but even so. I want to create works which encourage people to feel and engage. To live! Further, I believe as humans we could apologize less and take more risks. We are, of course, here to live. And to live requires no apology (see my previous blog on shame: http://blogs.vancouversun.com/2016/02/04/blog-2-reflections-and-thoughts-around-the-making-of-the-film-meet-cute-crazy8s16/). Let's get out of our own way and make beautiful things without apology. There are enough obstacles in the human journey without adding guilt, shame, and sorries (unless you're J ustin Bieber).

What does this mean for "Meet Cute?" Well, that tomorrow morning we are going to make the shit out this movie, of course.

Source: blog 3: reflections and thoughts around the making of "Meet Cute"